Woman Dictionary
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
I'm sorry = you'll be sorry
We need = I want
It's your decision = my correct decision should be obvious by now
Do what you want = you'll pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure go ahead = I don't want you to
I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron
You're so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house
I want new curtains = carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep
Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive
How much do you love me? = I did something today you're going to hate
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Are you listening to me!? = (Too late, you're dead)
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
I'm sorry = you'll be sorry
We need = I want
It's your decision = my correct decision should be obvious by now
Do what you want = you'll pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure go ahead = I don't want you to
I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron
You're so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house
I want new curtains = carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep
Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive
How much do you love me? = I did something today you're going to hate
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Are you listening to me!? = (Too late, you're dead)